Whiskey Sharts is a kick-ass-southern-rock band that hails from Shartsville, in the good ol’ US of Fuckin’ A. Founded by the late and great Stan Mason Dixon – may he rest in peace – Whiskey Sharts has become a legend in it’s very own town. After Stan Mason Dixon passed before their first show on a national tour, the band broke-up, unable to play the music again. It has been over a decade since the Music of the Whiskey Sharts has played in the town and not a record of the music was made. However, Pedro Ducer, the producer of Whiskey Sharts, and Tex Mac Arthur, the manager, have persuaded the band to get back together and make a Greatest Hits Album. So the boys packed up their things and have temporarily relocated to the most magical place in the world, Orlando, Florida. wslogo copy

Trace Harlan Edwin Crooks (THE Crook)


Trace is the lead guitarist and musical scribe of Whiskey Sharts, and not to mention the gifted nephew of the late and great Stan Mason Dixon. *May he rest in peace* Trace has been able to take the melody and lyrics of both Stan and Keith and make the kick-ass music you hear.

Rico Planeta

Rico is the wacky and always energetic drummer of Whiskey Sharts. He started his career as performer in the Shartsville Circus and later joined Whiskey Sharts when he missed the convoy to the next town the circus was going to. When he isn’t banging the hell out of the drums with Whiskey Sharts, he is either partying in the Coco Bongo District of Shartsville or taking a long siesta. Rico has been drumming for the Sharts since their conception back in the day. He has also been seen in the “Jimmy and Rico Hour” on SHTN during the time Whiskey Sharts were not together.


Beaver Davenport

Beaver is the owner of Beaver’s damn auto repair in Shartsville and lends his talents to Whiskey Sharts through his bass and drum playing. Since no one person can replace Uncle Stan, having several shitizens who can play the bass is necessary for Whiskey Sharts when they play their music outside of their home town. Since there aint too many cars in Shartsville on account you can walk to most places and people like the town bus, Beaver has a lot of time to play with Whiskey Sharts. You would swear he’s slaps that bass like a beaver slaps it’s tail, but that ain’t where he got that name. Next time you see him ask him the story of his name.

Keith Fucking Jackson

What can we say about the front man and lyricist for Whiskey Sharts that he hasn’t already said before? Legend has it he was raised by wolves and was found by the Montana family when he was about 5 years old. The Montana family own the Shartsville Saloon and Keith grew up there, watching Stan and Whiskey Sharts perform three nights a week. It wasn’t until Keith was a teenager that he joined Whiskey Sharts during a “Sing Karaoke with the Band” show. Keith performed his “ass off” in front of like 15 people; wooing the crowd and covering all the Whiskey Sharts’ songs in only a way Keith Fucking Jackson can. Stan offered Keith the front man position in Whiskey Sharts and the rest is history.


snakebassSnake Whissken

Snake is ssssmooth and sssslick on his bass when he plays with Whiskey Sharts. “No one sssslaps the bass the way he do.” Snake was charged with chasing out a group of snakes that had entangled themselves in the Shartsville Saloon one night. Well, Snake Whissken picked up the bass, slapped a few notes and those snakes high-tailed it out. Snake is also the only bassist the band has had that Keith can remember his name. Perhaps it’s the full snake skin suit he plays in on stage.



Rico Jr.

Rico Planeta Jr. is one of many Rico Juniors running around Shartsville. See, Rico ain’t veryrico-jr  good with coming-up with names and even remembering them for that matter so, he named all his sons and daughters Rico Jr. But this here Rico Jr is the very first one and wants to be like his Papi in every way. That’s why he learned to bang the drums so he can fill-in for his Papi when Whiskey Sharts needs him. Rico Jr. brings his own style and flare to the Sharts. Familia!


Share this Shartasticness